Changing Grace: Raising Girls in the Image of God

Each day at mealtime, our daughters say their grace, a simple child's prayer before eating.  We're trying to instill in them that it's important to be grateful for what we have to eat.  After interesting episodes of this (Jocelyn speeding through the words to get to her food, Jaelle not wanting to close her eyes), we've established a routine.  Until recently...

The grace we've taught the girls is the traditional "God is great, God is good.  Let us thank him for our food..."  One day, they said the words and I heard let us thank HIM.  This made me stop and take note.  I didn't say anything to them, but I pondered my hesitation.  Why did hearing them say thank HIM cause me to pause?  

I considered how we were raising our daughters.  We want them to be self-confident, loving, and mindful people.  We also want them to see themselves, as black females, in the image of God.  This prayer was repeating the idea that God is best represented in the image of a man.  Aren't our daughters God's image-bearers too?  I don't want my girls to view themselves as second-rate versions of humankind.  Their image of God is the beginning of their image of themselves.  Should a man be their master and provider?  Is a man closer to God than them?


I want them to know that God is beyond gender and yet encompasses all gender.  I would love if our daughters saw God as a woman and man.  Outside of and surpassing that, I would love them to see God as God, their Creator.  For that reason, we have changed grace in our home.  We now say:

God is great, God is good.
Lord, we thank You 
for our food.
By Your hands,
we are fed
Thank You Lord 
For our daily bread.
Amen.  

Grace sounds very similar to what it has been before, but there is no reference of gender.  I'm grateful for texts such as "She Who Is: The Mystery of God in Feminist Theological Discourse" by Elizabeth Johnson which point to the value in embracing feminine divinity within Christianity.  

I'm also more deeply appreciative of Womanist scholars such as Delores Williams who call for the need to employ black female images and perspectives of God.  Click to read Dr. Williams' account of what Womanist theology is using Alice Walker.  For Williams, this all centers on the question of "Who do you say God is?" - this is what made me pause - I want our  family to consider who we say God is.  I'm thankful for these women and for the many female scholars and ministers who are deepening my understanding of God.  


Our girls are teaching me a lot.  One Word may seem small, but one Word can change everything.   There's much more to say, but it's time to wake the girls for breakfast.  It is time to offer grace again.  God is great, God is good...




Lord, thank You for creating us.  Please forgive us for only seeing You in our image.  It is amazing to believe You are a God who creates beings that can create.  You are awesome!  Please help us to raise daughters and sons who see themselves in Your image and who value all people.  Personally, I pray that our family sees the fullness of Your image.  I pray that our girls love You, love themselves, and love others.  In Your precious, all-encompassing name, Amen.



Learning,
j.a.g.





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Genesis 1:27 (NRSV)

So God created humankind in his image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.

Galatians 3:28 (KJV)
There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.