The PhDecision: 8 Important Questions I Asked Before Going Back to School

This week, NBA players including Lebron James, Paul George, and Boogie Cousins made franchise altering decisions on the teams they would join. Recently I made a major decision about my own future and enrolled in a PhD program at North Carolina State University. Although my choice may not have the reach of theirs (sadly, there's no Cole Haan shoe deal for doc students), it certainly came with it’s own set of lifestyle consequences, family considerations, and salary cap implications. I wanted to share some of my reasoning and anxieties about going back to school in the hopes it may help someone else who is considering where they might take their talents.



Should I go back to school? While this feels like the most obvious quandary, it is really a Russian doll (pictured), a big question full of little questions. This is NOT the most important question.

 

In making this decision, it is crucial to make a distinction between learning and formal education. Learning is a lifelong enterprise. Learning comes with being a disciple and a student. I always want to be learning, questioning, examining the world around me. However, there are training programs, apprenticeships, volunteer opportunities, and even YouTube, where one can learn without oppressive financial and emotional debt. Formal education is not an altruistic endeavor or just for fun. Formal education is big business and at an average cost of between $11,000-$50,000+/year, it is a business decision. So I had to ask myself the little, big questions:

    1.   Does this degree give me the credentials, knowledge, or expertise to excel in my desired field?

    2.   Is this degree going to pay for itself - either by being free, reduced, or raising my earning potential to comfortably cover any incurred debt?

I was able to answer these satisfactorily but the booming, distracting question still remained - Should I go back to school? After reminding myself that this was NOT the real question (and becoming bleary-eyed staring at tuition tables), I remembered Howard McClusky's theory. In 1959, McClusky revealed his Power Load Margin theory which says, in sum, adults have to measure their own load (demands placed on them) and power (factors that they have to sustain the load) when deciding what educational goals they can manage. This theory lifted another set of questions for consideration:

    3.   Do I have the emotional, spiritual, physical support I need to complete this program?
    4.   Should I consider part time, full time, or distance learning?
    5.   Are there people around me who will keep me accountable and give me relief?
    6.   Are there things in my life I can reduce so my load is more manageable?
    7.   Does this program/school have a reputation for helping students manage their load?
 
Empowered with these practical answers, I was almost ready to apply. I am blessed to have a strong support system and as unpredictable as life is, I thought this may be the ideal time to do this degree. Yet, something was still gnawing at my spirit. Another existential, personal, and private question continued to whisper to me. When I sat quiet long enough, I heard it:


    8.   Does this degree define me?

 

I would be lying to say there is no ego involved in pursuing a doctorate. I needed to examine this tendency in myself so I retreated on a personal jet to the Caribbean. No, that was Lebron. Instead, I talked with friends who had done doctoral work about their experiences. One told me she had seen some of the most brilliant, competent, incredible people she knew become insecure shells of themselves due to their doctoral work. Another, who completed her PhD after much duress stated she will never judge anyone who does not complete the process because of the soul damage it can inflict. Others stated various tales of hardship and success.

Their words were sobering and liberating. These were people I revered and they had often struggled, sometimes given up, and sometimes overcame. They helped me answer this last question definitively. Does this degree define me? Hell no. Like Lebron's decision to play for LA, I was great before I came and I will be great when I leave. I do not need a degree to validate my greatness (sometimes I think a degree can obscure it).

I hope this is helpful to all sitting with your own questions. There were other signs and stories in my decision, but answering these questions was critical. This degree is feasible and practically possible, but not definitive. Even if I don't go to college, I deserve to be on the court. Ah yeah, that's right. Give me my jersey and the ball. God be with me, I'm ready.