Changing Grace: Raising Girls in the Image of God

Each day at mealtime, our daughters say their grace, a simple child's prayer before eating.  We're trying to instill in them that it's important to be grateful for what we have to eat.  After interesting episodes of this (Jocelyn speeding through the words to get to her food, Jaelle not wanting to close her eyes), we've established a routine.  Until recently...

The grace we've taught the girls is the traditional "God is great, God is good.  Let us thank him for our food..."  One day, they said the words and I heard let us thank HIM.  This made me stop and take note.  I didn't say anything to them, but I pondered my hesitation.  Why did hearing them say thank HIM cause me to pause?  

I considered how we were raising our daughters.  We want them to be self-confident, loving, and mindful people.  We also want them to see themselves, as black females, in the image of God.  This prayer was repeating the idea that God is best represented in the image of a man.  Aren't our daughters God's image-bearers too?  I don't want my girls to view themselves as second-rate versions of humankind.  Their image of God is the beginning of their image of themselves.  Should a man be their master and provider?  Is a man closer to God than them?


I want them to know that God is beyond gender and yet encompasses all gender.  I would love if our daughters saw God as a woman and man.  Outside of and surpassing that, I would love them to see God as God, their Creator.  For that reason, we have changed grace in our home.  We now say:

God is great, God is good.
Lord, we thank You 
for our food.
By Your hands,
we are fed
Thank You Lord 
For our daily bread.
Amen.  

Grace sounds very similar to what it has been before, but there is no reference of gender.  I'm grateful for texts such as "She Who Is: The Mystery of God in Feminist Theological Discourse" by Elizabeth Johnson which point to the value in embracing feminine divinity within Christianity.  

I'm also more deeply appreciative of Womanist scholars such as Delores Williams who call for the need to employ black female images and perspectives of God.  Click to read Dr. Williams' account of what Womanist theology is using Alice Walker.  For Williams, this all centers on the question of "Who do you say God is?" - this is what made me pause - I want our  family to consider who we say God is.  I'm thankful for these women and for the many female scholars and ministers who are deepening my understanding of God.  


Our girls are teaching me a lot.  One Word may seem small, but one Word can change everything.   There's much more to say, but it's time to wake the girls for breakfast.  It is time to offer grace again.  God is great, God is good...




Lord, thank You for creating us.  Please forgive us for only seeing You in our image.  It is amazing to believe You are a God who creates beings that can create.  You are awesome!  Please help us to raise daughters and sons who see themselves in Your image and who value all people.  Personally, I pray that our family sees the fullness of Your image.  I pray that our girls love You, love themselves, and love others.  In Your precious, all-encompassing name, Amen.



Learning,
j.a.g.





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Genesis 1:27 (NRSV)

So God created humankind in his image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.

Galatians 3:28 (KJV)
There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.

YGT: Administration Idol

Critiquing administration in a church is a lot like judging American Idol - anyone can do it.  You don't have to be a great singer to hear another person sing and immediately know "They CAN'T sing".  Likewise, we don't have to be good at administration to know when others aren't good at it.  When we attend church, we know immediately whether the administration is good or not.  We observe the orderliness of the ushers, the organization of the service, and even the parking situation!  We cast our vote immediately for whether a church can "sing" or not.  


It's helpful to observe Acts 2 to see what administration for the first church must have looked like.  They had lots of administrative headaches and yet they completed them with gladness, sincerity, grace, wisdom, and the Spirit.

• There was the exchanging of money between the rich and poor (someone had to be counting the money and distributing it) - v. 45 and Acts 4:33-37
• Lots of people were being fed everyday (someone was cooking and others were serving) - v. 46 and Acts 6:2-3
• There were people being added to the church daily (perhaps through baptism and/or teaching) - v. 47 and Acts 6:1

To be completely honest, I've often overlooked administration.  I would rather idealize, create, and do.  But over time, I've come to realize that effective administration is crucial to ministry.  It was critical for the first church to succeed and it's even more critical today.  Some of the worst testimonies of the church are from poor administration.  Almost everybody knows of a church that has experienced financial mismanagement, grumpy servants, or unorganized teaching.  


This is not an indictment on any particular church, but a calling to see administration as a spiritual gift.  If we are indeed a body, administration can be compared to the muscles.  They're usually never seen (and when they are, that means there's a serious problem).  However, the better the muscle is, the more that can be accomplished by the leg, arm, waist ... or voice.  When that happens, we can all readily agree, "That church can sing!"

Lord, please forgive me for overlooking administrative tasks.  Please help me to be better at responding to emails, meeting deadlines, and organizing my life.  Thank you for the people you have given to the church to help disciple your people.  For every trustee, usher, and secretary, thank You.  Please grant them each the grace, wisdom, and love that they may administer in Your Spirit.  Let all things be done decently and in order.  In Christ's name, Amen.  

Repenting,

j.a.g.

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Acts 2:42-47
42 They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer.
43 Everyone was filled with awe at the many wonders and signs performed by the apostles.
44 All the believers were together and had everything in common.
45 They sold property and possessions to give to anyone who had need.
46 Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts,
47 praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved. 

Acts 4:33-37
33 With great power the apostles continued to testify to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus. And God’s grace was so powerfully at work in them all
34 that there were no needy persons among them. For from time to time those who owned land or houses sold them, brought the money from the sales
35 and put it at the apostles’ feet, and it was distributed to anyone who had need.
36 Joseph, a Levite from Cyprus, whom the apostles called Barnabas (which means “son of encouragement”),
37 sold a field he owned and brought the money and put it at the apostles’ feet.


Acts 6:1-3
1 In those days when the number of disciples was increasing, the Hellenistic Jews[a] among them complained against the Hebraic Jews because their widows were being overlooked in the daily distribution of food.
2 So the Twelve gathered all the disciples together and said, “It would not be right for us to neglect the ministry of the word of God in order to wait on tables.
3 Brothers and sisters, choose seven men from among you who are known to be full of the Spirit and wisdom. We will turn this responsibility over to them

YGT: 5 Ways to Confront a Friend in Sin

Ever know someone who was engaging in sin and you didn't know how to talk to them?  Ever been confronted about sin yourself?  (Shhh, come closer)  Ever wanted a friend to confront you about sin?  This can be one of the most challenging parts of living a Christian life.   How can I live faithfully in love and yet speak up when friends and family sin?  Such tender topics require special attention to scripture.  We can see John 8 for Christ's classic confrontation with some stoners (read it below).  From it, we see that Jesus spoke...

• After Waiting - Jesus didn't say something as soon as he was told about it, he paused and began to write.  (v.6)  Don't be "trapped" into responding quickly - ask the Holy Spirit to reveal what and how to approach the situation.

• In Private - Jesus waited until he was alone with the woman.  He never mentioned her sin until they were in private.  (v. 9)  Making a scene shows pride and self-righteousness - a friend wouldn't reveal someone's sin in public.

• In Person - Jesus didn't let the men make the decision about the woman, he did it himself.  He stood up and spoke to the woman.  (v.10)  Speak directly to your friend - no one deserves to hear about themselves from others.

• In Grace - Jesus didn't condemn the woman, he defended her.  In fact, he challenged those who didn't realize their own sin.  The word of God wasn't to be used to stone people, but to liberate them. (v.10-11)  Always examine YOURSELF first and express God's forgiveness, compassion, and love.

• In Truth - Jesus knew the word of God, and because of that he did tell her she was living in sin.  He told her not to sin anymore. (v.11)  Know the Word before you make conclusive statements but don't shy away from telling the truth as you know it.*

Thank You Jesus!  From his actions, we know we should be very careful in this matter, but not careful enough to avoid it.  Conversations about sin can be powerful moments in a friendship.  Yet talking without considering Christ's example can be disastrous.  Let us all be willing to discuss sin and also to be confronted at times we don't meet the standards God has called us to.  Let's always remember, Jesus defended a sinner and gave his life for a whole bunch of them!

Lord, please forgive me for times when I have not lived according to Your Word.  Thank You for friends, mentors, and family members who are courageous and Godly enough to confront me.  Please give me the same conviction and grace in approaching those I love in areas of sin.  Let it strengthen our relationships and bond us together as we embrace the fulness of Christ's sacrifice for us.  Thank You for Jesus!  Amen.

Looking in,

j.a.g.

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John 8:3-113 The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group 

4 and said to Jesus, “Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. 

5 In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?” 

6 They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him.

But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. 

7 When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” 

8 Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.

9 At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. 

10 Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?”

11 “No one, sir,” she said.

“Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.”

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*Some of these are not universal.  Sometimes, you have to respond quickly (cases of abuse).  Sometimes, sin needs to be reprimanded publicly (social injustices come to mind).  Sometimes you may feel the Spirit urging you to talk to someone and you may still be figuring out exactly what the Word is saying to you.  However, each time you talk with someone it should be done in love and grace.  We should approach each conversation from the perspective of "How will God get glory out of this person's life (including their current situation)?"